May 31 2008
The Mommy Test
I have written two articles today because I just had to share this moment in the Colvin House with you. My other article is just below this one, so be sure not to miss it!
Last night Glenn and I were sitting on our back porch winding down from an emotional evening of our nephew’s high school graduation. Garrett came to join us on the porch because he was still hyped up from all the excitement of the evening.
Somehow, we got on the topic of heart attacks. (Our dear friend Rich is currently in a medically induced coma after a category 4 heart attack, so this has been in the forefront of my mine) I told Glenn and Garrett if you are ever alone and having a heart attack you should take deep breaths and cough hard to keep your heart pumping until you can get emergency services to help. (I don’t know if this is true… It was something I read.) Then, Garrett started poking at his stomach and I jokingly asked him if he was giving himself the heimlich maneuver. Garrett had heard the term, but didn’t really know what it was. So, I showed him how to do it and also told him if he were alone he could stand at the back of a chair and use the chair to push his diaphragm to get the object out.
Garrett looked at me thoughtfully and asked, “How do you know all this stuff?”
I thought quickly and remembered a cute email that I had received a while back about The Mommy Test. The email went like this….
A mother and her 4 yr old daughter were walking along and the mother was explaining things to her daughter as she asked questions. When the mother answered the last question the daughter asked her “How do you know all this stuff?” The mother replied, “It is on The Mommy Test” all mommy’s have to take this test to become a mommy. The little girl thought about that and said, “I see! If you don’t pass the test, you have to be a daddy!”
So, I told Garrett that it was on The Mommy Test and that was why I knew all that stuff. Garrett is 12 and usually not so gullible, but in his defense, I don’t usually tease him this way and am usually very honest.
“Really?” he asked.
“Yes!” I told him.
“So what if you fail The Mommy Test?” he asked
“What do you think happens?” I asked him.
He thought for a moment and said….
“You have to be a dad!”
LOL I laughed for the next hour about that one!!!!!

